HOW TO AVOID ARGUMENTS
SHHHHH!
That's about it. Just be quiet. Too many times we're so anxious to say what we believe about a given situation when we would be better off to just listen, truly listen to what's being said without formulating our rebuttal or response. Most of us are adamant when it comes to wanting to get our "two cents worth" into the conversation. We would all be wise to learn this:
The man of few words and settled mind is wise; therefore, even a fool is thought to be wise when he is silent. It pays him to keep his mouth shut. Proverbs 17:27 (TLB)
And James, the brother of our Lord gives us this advice:
Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. James 1:19 (NLT)
That is the key to good communication and good communication is the key to peace and harmony in any relationship.
Until tomorrow,
Pastor Steve
Monday, October 6, 2008
Fireproof Day 8
DO THE NEXT RIGHT THING
What do you have to lose?
There's an old commercial that used to say, "TRY IT YOU'LL LIKE IT! That's my encouragement to you today. And I would ask you, what do you have to lose?
You see, you'll never get better until you're willing to start where you are now. You can't start where you want to be eventually because, and I fear a 'duh' moment here; you're not there yet. And this is a fact: You'll never get there until you start where you are now by doing the NEXT RIGHT THING - not step 10 but step 1! What is that for most of us?
Begin by praying for the person God wants you to become - not for God to change the other person you're trying to love. Jesus gave us this instruction:
Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Matthew 7:3 (ESV)
What I've found is that the person's change that will make the most difference in my happiness, is me! It's like getting a new set of glasses; it just clears everything up when I get my vision straightened out. Then I can see what's up close (myself) as well as at a distance (my relationships) and what it will take to place all of them under Christ's guidance and control. When we do this, lots of things will change, but mostly me.
Have you started your Love Dare Challenge? We ran out of books yesterday but it's not too late to order. How about getting some as gifts for your married children or grandchildren?
Until tomorrow,
Pastor Steve
LOVE DARE CHALLENGE - WEEK 2
HUSBANDS: EVERY DAY THIS WEEK, ASK THE LORD TO SHOW YOU ONE WAY TO LOVE YOUR WIFE, AND THEN DO IT.
WIVES: EVERY DAY THIS WEEK, ASK THE LORD TO SHOW YOU ONE WAY TO LOVE YOUR HUSBAND, AND THEN DO IT.
SINGLES: MAKE A LIST (RIGHT NOW) OF 6 FAMILY MEMBERS, FRIENDS OR CO-WORKERS AND ASSIGN A DAY TO EACH OF THEM. THEN, EVERY DAY THIS WEEK, ASK THE LORD TO SHOW YOU ONE WAY TO LOVE THE PERSON OF THE DAY, THEN DO IT.
What do you have to lose?
There's an old commercial that used to say, "TRY IT YOU'LL LIKE IT! That's my encouragement to you today. And I would ask you, what do you have to lose?
You see, you'll never get better until you're willing to start where you are now. You can't start where you want to be eventually because, and I fear a 'duh' moment here; you're not there yet. And this is a fact: You'll never get there until you start where you are now by doing the NEXT RIGHT THING - not step 10 but step 1! What is that for most of us?
Begin by praying for the person God wants you to become - not for God to change the other person you're trying to love. Jesus gave us this instruction:
Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Matthew 7:3 (ESV)
What I've found is that the person's change that will make the most difference in my happiness, is me! It's like getting a new set of glasses; it just clears everything up when I get my vision straightened out. Then I can see what's up close (myself) as well as at a distance (my relationships) and what it will take to place all of them under Christ's guidance and control. When we do this, lots of things will change, but mostly me.
Have you started your Love Dare Challenge? We ran out of books yesterday but it's not too late to order. How about getting some as gifts for your married children or grandchildren?
Until tomorrow,
Pastor Steve
LOVE DARE CHALLENGE - WEEK 2
HUSBANDS: EVERY DAY THIS WEEK, ASK THE LORD TO SHOW YOU ONE WAY TO LOVE YOUR WIFE, AND THEN DO IT.
WIVES: EVERY DAY THIS WEEK, ASK THE LORD TO SHOW YOU ONE WAY TO LOVE YOUR HUSBAND, AND THEN DO IT.
SINGLES: MAKE A LIST (RIGHT NOW) OF 6 FAMILY MEMBERS, FRIENDS OR CO-WORKERS AND ASSIGN A DAY TO EACH OF THEM. THEN, EVERY DAY THIS WEEK, ASK THE LORD TO SHOW YOU ONE WAY TO LOVE THE PERSON OF THE DAY, THEN DO IT.
Fireproof Day 7
THE FOUNDATION STONE
Summary - Week 1
Wow! What a week. This FIREPROOF thing is rocking the U.S.A. I praise God for this church, Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, GA for their faithfulness in using their resources in doing something so unselfish and global in nature. They are indeed, FIREPROOFING many lives through the testimony of this movie. But remember, it must start in the home, at the very heart of who we are called to be. Let me remind us of a couple of the powerful verses from week one that sets the bar very high for all of us.
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Ephesians 5:21 (NLT)
This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. Ephesians 5:32 (NLT)
This is why it is so important for all of us to realize the basis for every relationship is built upon this fact: Submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
I was speaking to a friend this morning that is experiencing some marital strife. Their biggest issue is this very thing; submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. Yet this fundamental truth is the latchkey for every bit of happiness and satisfaction in life - submitting our life to one another and the key is: "Out of reverence for Christ." As I explained to my friend, without this submitting factor, there is absolutely not an area of life where a person will be satisfied. Why? Because unless I will submit to "one another" I'll never submit to Christ either - it's a flaw in our human nature that is the root of all sin, namely ME! Unless I will submit to others as well as Christ, then every decision I make will be about MY hurt, MY pain, My need to be understood, My failure to move on from a past hurt, MY need to be satisfied rather than give up myself for God and others.
This week, I challenge you to review the message from this morning at TVCC. If you missed it, Gene will have it online by Tuesday afternoon at www.tvcc.us. Why is so important? If you don't connect with the Source of love which powers every relationship, you'll never be able to give it away to others; husband, wife, friend, neighbor, family - no one. It will be impossible to give away what you've never seen or experienced and this love can only be found in Christ who broke the barriers as He demonstrated for us that it can be done. Remember 1 John 4:19 -
We love each other because he loved us first.
I'm looking forward to our week together!
Until tomorrow,
Pastor Steve
Summary - Week 1
Wow! What a week. This FIREPROOF thing is rocking the U.S.A. I praise God for this church, Sherwood Baptist Church in Albany, GA for their faithfulness in using their resources in doing something so unselfish and global in nature. They are indeed, FIREPROOFING many lives through the testimony of this movie. But remember, it must start in the home, at the very heart of who we are called to be. Let me remind us of a couple of the powerful verses from week one that sets the bar very high for all of us.
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Ephesians 5:21 (NLT)
This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. Ephesians 5:32 (NLT)
This is why it is so important for all of us to realize the basis for every relationship is built upon this fact: Submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
I was speaking to a friend this morning that is experiencing some marital strife. Their biggest issue is this very thing; submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. Yet this fundamental truth is the latchkey for every bit of happiness and satisfaction in life - submitting our life to one another and the key is: "Out of reverence for Christ." As I explained to my friend, without this submitting factor, there is absolutely not an area of life where a person will be satisfied. Why? Because unless I will submit to "one another" I'll never submit to Christ either - it's a flaw in our human nature that is the root of all sin, namely ME! Unless I will submit to others as well as Christ, then every decision I make will be about MY hurt, MY pain, My need to be understood, My failure to move on from a past hurt, MY need to be satisfied rather than give up myself for God and others.
This week, I challenge you to review the message from this morning at TVCC. If you missed it, Gene will have it online by Tuesday afternoon at www.tvcc.us. Why is so important? If you don't connect with the Source of love which powers every relationship, you'll never be able to give it away to others; husband, wife, friend, neighbor, family - no one. It will be impossible to give away what you've never seen or experienced and this love can only be found in Christ who broke the barriers as He demonstrated for us that it can be done. Remember 1 John 4:19 -
We love each other because he loved us first.
I'm looking forward to our week together!
Until tomorrow,
Pastor Steve
Fireproof Day 6
Architect or Arson?
Building Bridges or Burning Bridges?
We are all one or the other - no middle ground allowed. It's time to get real and when you get real, you get time; time to think, time to dream, time to repair, and time to heal, and most importantly, time to love. As we head into the weekend, reflect on your life.
Building Bridges or Burning Bridges?
We are all one or the other - no middle ground allowed. It's time to get real and when you get real, you get time; time to think, time to dream, time to repair, and time to heal, and most importantly, time to love. As we head into the weekend, reflect on your life.
- Have you been a healer or a hurter?
- Are you a part of the solution or are you fixed on the problem?
- Have you given up on happiness because someone gave up on you?
- Are you failing to forge your future because you can't forget your past?
I'm asking God for miraculous cures in relationships and I believe Him for them. Why?
Because God is in the miracle working business! As the angel said to Mary about the birth of John the Baptist to a woman past her prime named Elizabeth, and that she herself would be pregnant with the very Son of God, even though she'd never had sexual relations with a man,
"For nothing will be impossible with God." Luke 1:37 (ESV)
Father, I trust your heart to do what only you can do this weekend. Relationships everywhere, people reading this I don't even know, are being torn apart by their stubbornness and unwillingness to turn to you, the great healer of hearts. I pray that you will mend hearts, restore relationships, and heal homes and marriages this very weekend. The thing we think is impossible may indeed be impossible in our finite minds, but nothing, absolutely nothing is impossible when you are invited into the middle of impossible! Thank you for what you're going to do and are already doing to capture lives and turn our hearts toward home.In Jesus Name I pray, Amen.
Until tomorrow,
Pastor Steve
Fireproof Day 5
It Begins
The start of something great!
"FIREPROOF: CAPABLE OF WITHSTANDING OR PREVENTING DAMAGE BY FIRE."
The start of something great!
"FIREPROOF: CAPABLE OF WITHSTANDING OR PREVENTING DAMAGE BY FIRE."
Tonight and over the next few weeks many of you will see the movie, FIREPROOF. As you do, I want to give you a listener's guide. Ask yourself these questions about yourself and seek to answer them honestly about your relationships, not only as a husband or wife, but also as a parent, youth, or friend. Every relationship is important and as such, deserves the effort of time and communication to make it the best it can possibly be.
- Is there a problem in my relationship with my spouse or friend? What is my part in the problem? (Don't play the "yeah but" game. "Yeah I might have been wrong but they should/shouldn't have done this or that)
- Am I seeking to understand my husband/wife/family member/friend?
- What can I do to immediately change my actions or attitudes?
- How have I left God out of my life and this relationship?
- Do I need to extend or ask for forgiveness of a wrong done to another, whether I realized it or not? (Just because I didn't know it, doesn't excuse it. When it's revealed, I have only one option - confess it and turn from it to God's way)
- Am I willing to do whatever it takes to bring healing to a relationship, and particularly my marriage, that I am in the process of throwing away?
I can hear the gears turning out there as some of you say, "But pastor, you just don't know what I've been through or what I'm going through." No, but God does! He can and will repair, heal, fix, reconstruct, and reconcile any relationship placed into His care when two people are willing to do so. You can't fix anyone else but you can trust God to lovingly rebuild your heart and leave the results up to Him!
Until tomorrow,
Pastor Steve
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